Ruffles

Something I've thought about is how sometimes the things that we did when we were younger that made us happy can still make us happy now. Life has changed me, for better, for worse, regardless, it has. With all the commotion about pants, feminism, opting out or in, and other such things related to being a woman, I too have had all these thoughts on my mind. 

http://bighugelabs.com/onblack.php?id=3569517930

I think my thoughts on "mormon feminism" will be kept silent for now, as will my thoughts on being a "feminist" in general (the two things are quite different in fact), but I will say and admit that I am indeed a feminist. A feminist believes in and advocates social, political and equal rights for women. Lest we get too jumpy and divisive - I will not admit or spell out what that looks like for me or speculate on what it means for others because there is too much to say and most of it is strongly held belief and opinion for anyone involved. In fact, this issue is so confusing and explosive that even if you are on the same side, it will take a while to be convinced. 

Here is what I will say about feminism and how it relates to ruffles*:

In making my way through school for so long, I have become awesome at playing what I will call my "man card." I am super proficient at all those required patterns that have worked in my favor to get me to where I need to be. In doing so, I have forgotten what it means to be feminine. This is not an everyone problem; this is a me problem. When I was a kid, I played with barbies and dolls until I was WAY too old, and always was super girly. In fact, it is dramatically ironic that it was my older sister who was tom-boyish, and I was the one who always wanted to play dress up or wear bright colors and polka-dots and really big ruffles on everything including the big bows in my curly crazy hair. I can't put my finger on when, but at some point, I must have subconsciously decided that those things were not okay. Little by little they got replaced by those things that made up my "man card" tool kit. And so, it goes. 

But here's the thing, I'm tired of it. I've decided that now, now that I've done it, I'm done. I will confess here and now that I love dresses. I love the idea of shoes even though I can't ever find the right ones. I love brightly pink painted toes. I love brightly colored anything. I will get drawn into shows about fashion and sometimes feel guilty when I have an opinion on celebrity gossip. These are mostly the outwardly expressive things, but all those other traits that are feminine that I have subconsciously dismissed, I am inviting back into my life too. Officially, I am throwing out the opinion that me being feminine and girly is incompatible with me being smart (or everything else I've worked so hard to become for that matter). (Celebrity Endorsement Here!) It was a terrible and totally wrong belief in the first place, but it's one that I bought into. I'm putting it down, and learning to be okay about being feminine. It took me a long time to get here. Look, everyone has a different path. Sometimes I don't pick up what you're putting down quite as quickly as you'd like me to, but now, I'm standing up for ruffles.**

(I'm still not into clicky shoes, but mostly because they are not functional and I don't like all that much attention.)

*Also, I know that feminism does not equal ruffles. 

**On further note, I just looked up ruffles in pinterest and most things were an abomination to me, so I stand up more for the thought rather than the actual practice. There are very few ruffley things I would wear according to that search.